It’s true that I was the one who put myself in this situation.
But I believe that it’s good to take note of the fact that it was human instinct – a reaction to the stimulus (or to the stimuli, rather) – that led me to this situation. It just so happened that now I’m here, I can’t decide whether I will go further about it or stop and go back the old life.
Aaahh, the old and comfortable life – the present.
First and foremost, even after almost half a decade of living this life, I still can’t believe that I had (and have) this privilege. I mean, being here is such a prestige. I can’t even pinpoint which part of me made me qualify, or am I even qualified in the first place? Were they sure that it was really me whom they wanted to tap and that they did not mistaken me for someone else? I sound unconfident because this is how I seriously feel.
How can I not think twice when despite the fact that there are days when I transform to the lowest level of being human, most of the time I’m in the level next to the highest, if not in the highest. It’s both sweat and glamour at the same time.
Let me just put it this way: think of Isaac Newton’s Law of Action and Reaction. When you get caught in a life and death situation, remember that there’s a rainbow always after the rain. And vice versa. When the rainbow comes first, the rain will follow.
Overall, it’s the best place my feet has ever stepped into. And I have to say that at this moment, nothing can match it. I’m very very blessed.
I also don’t know.
I guess it’s a matter of looking at the other side, finding out if there’s something that’s waiting for you out there and testing the learnings that you have acquired (if there was real acquisition, in the first place).
It can also be about avoiding the curse of comfort zones – you know, it’s easier now than it will be in the next two years.
It may be about unconsciously expanding knowledge,
Or maybe merely just taking a break. You see, my feet are taking me to the beach every month now!
Ultimately, I am human and I am just responding.